Help Wanted

Do you think your readers could help me to get information about the women’s point of view of bondage and rubber/leather. I would like the information either as an ACS member to ACS member; or perhaps some points I wish to have answered could be put to an expert, or else my questions could be put in an open letter to all your readers.

As in most of the ACS members’ cases, I suspect it is the husband who has the main interest in bondage. My wife participates provided it is kept within certain limits and adopts either the dominant or submissive role according to our preferences at the time.

I know what I like and will often invent a routine in order to get the most sexual satisfaction from it. My wife is different and panics if left to create an ‘evening’s entertainment’ entirely without any help from me so I have to put forward two or three scenarios which she can adapt or interchange in order to keep me in suspense, regarding how long I remain tied up or what comes next or what position I am tied up in etc. etc. when she is ‘in charge’: obviously, when I put forward proposals it is based ‘on my preference.

Occasionally I ask if there is anything bondage-wise that turns her on that could be incorporated? I am usually told that there is nothing she can think of and that bondage doesn’t matter so much to her anyway. Our games tend to be one sided so that I enjoy them and want more while my wife frequently gets bored and wants less. So my first two questions are: what is it about bondage that women enjoy most and how can I get my wife to create situations biased towards her own sexual satisfaction? She is very independently minded and hates being tied up for long so the ‘rape’ or ‘prisoner fantasies’ would not appeal.

She enjoys being allowed to attempt to escape from bondage (and usually succeeds unless I tie her up so tightly it hurts): and when actually committed to doing something she does get turned on more if she dresses ‘tartily’ – heavy eye make-up, strong perfume, blonde wig, stockings, suspenders, high heels, frilly open crotch knickers, short skirts, etc. This ‘disguise’ allows her to become someone else and it is not really the wife/housewife/mother who is doing these things but her husband’s girlfriend/mistress/call-girl or whatever. Even so this just puts her in the mood for sex, and it is the sex at the end of the evening that gives her most satisfaction; nothing that happens earlier does much for her.

What is it that women enjoy about rubber etc. What particular aspects of bondage do women like? Are there cases where the wife is the one most interested and the husband ‘goes along’? I would dearly like to know. I know I am not alone in this – see the ‘Letters’ columns of many men’s magazines – but at least my wife has tried.

Could your readers help me in any way at all to really turn my wife on through bondage in rubber and leather? How can I introduce her to your world of rubber and leather clothes so that she can enjoy it as much as I do?

– ACS 468